"Not the victory but the action. Not the goal but the game.
In the deed the glory."

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Some People are Dumb

Some days can be slow around here. I often fill my down time by trying to better myself with hours of surfing the web. I came across this story and was so blown away by it that I had to share it. So, some dude (23 yrds old and 6'1") attempts to rob a grocery store, with a gun nonetheless. He is thwarted during the robbery attempt. You are probably asking yourself what is so unusual about that? Was he subdued by a pistol packing off duty police officer? By a local member of the hockey team? By a street hooligan with a heart of gold? By a kick boxer in training? Not so fast my friend, his robbery attempt is foiled by a 5'4" 66 year old man. The weapon of choice? A can of applesauce. Not only does he stop the robbery, but he pounds this guy into unconsciousness. In addition to getting pummelled by Mr. Magoo he also shoots himself in the head. I read this story about 10 times and just can't get over it. How does this happen? How does any self respecting criminal let a man half his size and 3 times his age get the drop on him? Can you even imagine what this guys buddies are going to say to him next time they see him? That I think would be the worst penalty, the total loss of your manhood among your felon buddies. Yeah, the pending charges of attempted murder and attempted robbery would be bad enough, but admitting that you got your butt kicked by somebody's pint sized Grandpa would really ruin your day. Somewhere there has to be a video of this, and I think I would pay money to see it.

I have another good website that can be used to whittle the time away. Bill Simmons is a sports writer for ESPN, and upon the advice of the Hammer I started checking his column out. It is downright hilarious. You can find it here: I think my favorite thing about his writing is that he blends in pop culture, and he is just a few years older than me so there are a lot of great references.

One benefit to being in Iraq surfaced this week. We are on the "other side of the pond" so we can watch the British Open live and not on tape delay. Ernie Els aka the Big Easy is off to a good start at -3. ***UPDATE: while I'm writing he just birdied 16 to go to -4*** However ol' Lefty is leading right now. I'll definitely be rooting against him like always. John Daly looks to have sobered up and left the casino long enough to be sitting at -1 under right now. I don't know what it is about that guy, but he loves the British Open and always brings his A game. ***UPDATE: Els just duck hooked his drive into the rough but looks to have recovered nicely and may be on the green in two.***


Brian said...

So I'm reading away laughing like a school boy at this last post. You should right a book while you have so much free time. Your explicatives and references are hilarious. This robbery story is even better than the story of that idiot that left our party that night and robbed that place with the Duck Hunt gun cause' "he was hungry" after we had just got done chowin' down on Ramos pizza. Then he got busted with the darn gun still on the seat of his car.
What was that kind of idiot ever doing at are place?

I thought you were a "Lefty" fan? Guess I'm wrong. Peaks and Valleys...

Sack said...

I told someone that story a few months back. Who drives back past a gas station they just robbed 10 minutes after robbing it?

I think we may have been one of Kiawitz buddies. That would explain a lot.

Surely you jest. Lefty is a great golfer but not someone I root for.